Week 5 is upon us and Thursday nights game, to start us off, was, well….a disaster area! Unless you played the Broncos or the Colts defense, you had a horrible start to your week. To make matters worse, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, went to the game in person, and walked out, like every Broncos fan, with their heads down, and their hands on their foreheads in disbelief. Russ went to cook, and forgot he left the oven on high, therefore causing a fire, and well, the place feels more empty than when he walked into it the first time. 

Kyle, I can somewhat feel your pain sir, just in a little different way. But, on behalf of The League, we would all like to say….we are sorry, and hope for better days to come sir. 

Alright, let’s get to it, shall we?!?!

Week 5 Matchups…

As always, we start out with our current number 1 team…

Baby Don/Connor(1) vs. Vladimir Putin/Steve(4)!!!

Alright now…Connor is 4-0. Let me repeat that…Connor is 4-0. Why did I have to repeat that? Well, because, we 80% of the league voted and said that, based off the draft, that Connor would come in dead last this year!!! And well, though the tides could change, the chances of him coming in dead last are becoming very scarce! With that being said…Will he take his first lose to, one of four teams, that are 3-1?!?! Could it be this week? Could week 5 be his time to hand over his crown? We will see! But one things for certain, I know it won’t come without a fight! And a fight it’ll be! The QBs are going to be strong in the matches…

Paffs QB – The Goat – Tom Brady vs. Atl

Connors QB – The future Goat – Justin Herbert vs. Clev

Herbert has been banged up, not should be getting past his rib pains. Tom Brady showed up in a big way, and said, “See, I just needed some actual weapons to throw to!” And well, he’ll have both Evans and Godwin back again, and should be solid again! 

I think I might have an edge on Connor in the RB side of things though, as I have the current number 1 RB in Chubb and Fournette! Whereas he has Kamara, whom I do think has a bounce back game this week, and CEH, whom has been getting a lot of negative stuff said about him, but yet puts up numbers every week. And oh btw, don’t look now, but CEH is currently the number 4 ranked RB…what’s there not to like about that? 

As for the WRs! Well, it’s very strong on both sides here…

Paffs Evans and Deebo vs Connors Waddle and Mike Williams!! 

Like I said, it’s going to be a battle, even down to the kickers and defenses on both our sides! 

As far as predictions go…

I say Paff Daddy or Vladimir Putin gives Baby Don his first spanking, and sends this little baby crying home! 

Alright, moving on…

But first…I couldn’t help but tell you a joke since the Baby Don and Putin were playing each other this week, I find it perfect to share this with you! …

Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin meet with guests at the White House. One of the guests asks: “Mister President, what are you talking about with president Putin?” – “We are planning World War III.’ – ‘And what does it look like?’ – Trump: “We will kill 4 million Muslims and a dentist…” The guest looks a bit confused: “Why a dentist?” – Putin claps Trump on the back and says, “What did I tell you, Donald? No one will ask about the Muslims.”

Lol. Sorry, I had to. It was the perfect set up! 

Alright, moving on…

Wait…before we move on, I have to ask you something! What is a Russian on a cracker called? Putin on a Ritz!!

Alright, I’m done! For real this time!

Next up…

We have…

Jesus Christ/Kyle(2) vs I Cheat 24/7/Sam(5)

You wanna talk about another juicy matchup?! Step right up and see for yourself! Jesus, as you know, is a big time Superman and has won this last 3 in a row! And well, as for Sam, don’t let that 5th place fool you, as he is as equal to Kyle’s 3-1 standings as well! Yes sir! This one’s going to be solid! It’ll be a big time fight as these two have the number 1 and number 2 overall  QBs! Mr. Josh Allen vs The Lamar Jackson!! So what stands between the two and what makes one number 1 and the other, number 2? I’ll tell you…just 10 points! Yep! Lamar only has 10 more points than Allen and well, both have yet another juicy matchup on deck! Allen plays Pit and Lamar plays Cin! This could be so close, that the two QBs end up staying in their same piston by the end of the game! As for RBs, I do think Kyle has the Edge with Ekeler and Sanders, vs Sams Conner and Stevenson, but at the same time, both of Sams RBs have easy matchups, so it could go either way! As for WRs, we’ll, this is where the needle moves int Sams area for me, has he has a trio of studs with Kupp, Higgins and St. Brown!! But, Jesus has Devonte Adams and one of the strongest TEs in Andrews! Both have strong Ks, but Kyle has the better Def in TB against Atl this week! 

Like I said, it’ll be a strong matchup for these two…however, as far as my prediction goes…

I say Jesus doesn’t like cheaters and takes home his 4th win in a row!! 

Up next!!..

One of the longest teams names in history vs. the guy who doesn’t know how to change his team name and continues to lose because of it!!!

ConnorDay&JeremyMarsh4eva/Brad(3) vs. Spicy Brown Mostert/Jake(10)

Well, this can’t get any worse for Jake, right? Oh, wait, never mind, here comes one of the strongest 3-1 teams vs the absolute worst team this year! It has not been pretty for Jake, and well, it doesn’t get any easier this week. 

Brads team is balling with Maholmes as his QB…Chase and Jefferson as his WRs…and Mr. Yes I can put up 41 points and be a stud TE for you, TJ Hockenson!! 

As for Jake, well, like I said, it’s not pretty! His current QB, Marcus Mariota, is the 22nd ranked QB.(Please, for the love of God, go get a better QB man!!!) his current RBs, Darrell Henderson, ranked 40th and Tony Pollard, ranked 38th, are as bad of a RB combo, that you almost want to go cry in the corner when you look at it. Jake, at least go put Harris in your lineup, he’s the 18th best RB, and he going to waste on your bench! Get some life put in that team and let’s gooooo!! Lol! To make matters worse, Jake had Sutton only put up 12.40 points, which isn’t bad, but when your an 0-4 team looking for that first W, you gotta have some serious points going up! One big and bright star Jake he is Diggs! That man, as we know, can and has put up 46 points just 2 weeks ago, and Jake will rely heavily on him to help him in getting that W he so desperately needs!

There’s no a lot I can say on this matchup…it truly looks like a David and Goliath type match, and well, unless David(Jake) can make some moves and find that one rock that he can use to slay the giant with, it’s all in Goliath(Brad) favor for sure on this one. Brad…don’t squash him too bad sir. He’s already in enough pain. 

Moving on…

Up next…

1-3 vs 1-3!!!

Hot 4 Stephen Ross/Gregg(6) vs. Zeke in My Butt Hurts/Josh(8)!!

Oh boy! This could get messy! Almost like that Thursday night game, where both teams are good, but it’s going to be a defense kinda game!! 

Though Josh has the edge on Greg with his QB, Hurts…Greg’s QB Carr, could be a sneaky good play against KC! Don’t believe me? Check this out…week 1, Murray vs. KC…24.62 points. Week 2, Justin Herbert vs. KC…29.46 points. Week 3, Matt Ryan vs. KC…19.28 points. And week 4, Tom Brady vs. KC…31.40 points! That’s an average of 26.19 points!! And I think Carr has it in him to do the same! If he does, he’ll give Hurts as good run for his money! As for their RBs, again, pretty even as Greg has Henry, number 9 ranked RB vs. Joshes number 2 ranked RB, Barkley going head to head! Then, we move down the latter some and see Greg’s WRs, whom I think has the sedge with Tyreek Hill, Marquise Brown and Godwin! Though Pittman played on Thur, he only put up 10.90 points, which should definitely give Josh some added confidence going into Sunday! Defenses look great on both sides with Greg having the number 1 Defense in the Eagles! Wait, how mad are you Josh, that he’s playing your own Eagles Def against you? Uh oh!! Lol. Josh, on the other hand has the 4th best, in someone of a surprise, Jags defense! As of this writing, Greg currently doesn’t have a K in place, so Josh has the edge there. 

Overall, my prediction on this one, and I think this one will be close and I could be wrong here…I hate for you to take your 3rd lose in a row Josh, but I think Gregs sneaky QB play and strong WRs, plus using your own Eagles defense against you, he takes this one over you. But, at the same time, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Hurts put up 50 points on Ari!! Good luck to the both of you!!!

Last but not least…

The guy who likes to touch little Boyd’s and prides himself on being the number 1 cheating brother around these parts vs the once called, legendary BBQ man, who’s gone to completely whiffing golf balls! 

This isn’t for the faint of hearts on this matchup! But we gotta do what we gotta do! Yet another 1-3 matchup, these two have good teams, but can’t seem to get their teams on the same page every week. Let’s dig in…

Robert has a trio of QBs that just haven’t done much anything for him…Dak, after only putting up 4.46 points in week one due to injury, has been out ever since and won’t join his team in week 5 either. Stafford, last years  Super Bowl QB, can’t seem to stop throwing interceptions this year and find himself ranked at number 23 right now. And then Cousins, who seems to only have good games every other week, but still is number 16th ranked QB, sure makes it tough on Robert. Though, if Cousins continues his pattern, this week, vs the Bears, ought to be a good one! Drew on the other hand, has himself a good QB on Murray as he’s ranked  6th overall, but has a tough matchup on deck against the number 1 defense, The Eagles!! I feel like this one might be one of those games where Drew will be clinching his butt cheeks in hopes that Murray puts up something decent for him. As for the RBs, they looks strong on both sides…Robert with CMC and Aaron Jones vs Drew’s Mixon and Pierce! The WRs look strong on those sides, but think that Robert might have the slight edge, as Drew has AJ Brown and Terry McLaurin vs Roberts Lamb and Kirk! Now, here’s where things start to get interesting to me…Robert has a big name TE in Waller, but is the 12 ranked TE, whereas Drew has the 7th ranked TE in Freiermuth! Though, Waller has an easier matchup against KC vs Freiermuth does against Buff, I still like that Pickett seems to like to throw to the guy and will most likely use him as his safety valve! 

Scroll on down and take a look at these two flex spots and once again, you’ll find so good stuff stashed on both sides. Though I give Drew the slight edge on his flex with Jamaal Williams(an absolute stud while Swift has been out) and Cooper(a boom or bust, but I say he’s a boom this week against the Chargers) vs Roberts up and coming Dobbins and his down and going DJ Moore!  Lol. 

My prediction…

Just like the matchup between Greg and Josh, this one could come down to the wire. But, I’m leaning towards Drew on this one, but it’ll be close. Again, Drew has the better QB, but with his matchup this week, he may not perform up to par. But I give Drew the slight edge, and it’s truly a slight edge. 

Well, that’s it for me fellas! Good luck and we will see you on the flip side!!!